Covid Has Finished it All. Or Has it?

For the longest time possible, I have been someone who cannot help but look at the brighter side of life. Be it my failed relationships over the years, professional work life or anything else for that matter, I have forever believed, whatever destiny has in store, is mostly for good. So much so, that when Covid 19 hit the world by a massive surprise, I was, like everyone else all across the globe, shocked and after the initial shock died down, and the entire world went into months of lockdown, I was slowly prepared for what to come.

I knew, a lot of us would struggle financially, work-wise and a lot of other unforeseen events would happen. And that is exactly what happened – people lost their jobs, things turned real nasty. But, looking at the brighter side of life, I was glad that the lockdowns were being slowly being lifted and probably, maybe, we will start finding work and would be able to take care of our families and ourselves as well. The initial struggle did happen, no doubt. But, then work started to come, slowly but surely. I was hopeful and happy that although things could never be 100% same (pre Corona), but atleast even this “new normal” wasn’t something that we needed to curse.

And then, it happened! The 2nd wave hit the world and India and everything went down the drain. This wave has been absolutely terrible. It has affected everyone around me. A lot of my friends have been affected; either they were down with Covid or their families were. A lot of people I knew personally lost their lives. It is just sadness and a grim situation, no matter where I look – online or offline, all we get to hear on a daily basis are uncontrollable death and spread of the virus.

During the 2nd week of April, I also came down with a mild fever (99F), to which I suspected was Covid. Ofcourse, as expected, I couldn’t get the tests done because of the huge pressure on the entire medical system of the country. My tests, which I scheduled were automatically cancelled atleast 3 times, and I just gave up. Ofcourse, I had isolated myself inside my room from the day I started to feel feverish and instantly started with the recommended medicines that I had heard were working. I also consulted a couple of doctors online and they strictly suggested me to start meds from day 1.

Ofcourse, I am okay now (and hence I am able to post this blog tonight as I cannot sleep), and the fever abated after 4 days of being a constant 99F. I showed no other symptoms though. So, I am still confused whether it was indeed Covid or a flu. But, what concerns me at this point of time in my life is work. I’ve no work at all, and whatever projects were lined up were all but cancelled. So, practically, I have exactly zero projects in my hands and with the situation not getting any better in Delhi or in the country as a whole, it is only going to get worse from bad.

I am so financially broke that I am not even able to order a pack of coffee online (of which I am a huge lover!). I just realized as I went online onto Blue Tokai coffee’s website that I couldn’t even afford Rs.830/- for my coffee and a pack of filter paper! It is sad and depressing, but like I’ve said, I am someone who thinks positive and tries to look at the silver lining.

I have hope. Hope that things will eventually be better. Hope that the value of human life would be understood by a country who is, right now, seems least bothered. Hope that work will follow and so will some sort of financial stability. Till then, I am thankful that I and my loved ones and close friends are doing alright. And holding on. For that is all that’s required as of now. Ofcourse, apart from masking up all the time and properly sanItizing ourselves…

Is it Really so Hard to Find Love?

Let me clear one simple thing at the outset – being single isn’t a curse and being in a relationship isn’t a cure-all. No matter what stage of life you’re in, it’s important to take a look at your own personality type—to look at the habits and choices that are helping you and the ones that are hurting you.

I’ve come to realize, over the past few years, most women are usually at one extreme or the other – either, desperate and willing to put up with anything, or too picky and unwilling to “settle” for anything less than their dream man.

It’s OK to have standards and to have an idea of the kind of guy you want to be with, but it’s also important to be a little flexible and realize that you might not get every single thing you want, and that doesn’t mean you’re “settling” or compromising.

Maybe you don’t like his job, maybe you don’t like the way he dresses, maybe you think his hobbies are lame. This all might be true, but it’s important to realize that these things don’t tell you who he is, and who he is might be a really wonderful, kind, caring person.

When you open your mind just a bit, you might find yourself very pleasantly surprised! ♥️

What Is Wrong!?

The world is changing as we know it. With more than 2 months gone in lockdown, it goes unsaid that things aren’t the same anymore and it won’t be same ever. Be it our mental health or the ‘health’ of the jobs that we have been doing, nothing will be the same ever again.

And since, in this blog post, I have decided to open up, let me give you a brief insight into my life right now, in May, 2020. I’ve no work (literally, ZERO), no money in my bank a/c and no matter how many phone-calls or emails I shoot, nothing seems to be working out. All I get as a ‘reply’ is either, “We’ll get back to you with work related query.”, or worse yet, no reply at all.

Frankly, I am not the kind of guy who generally discusses my problems with people, for I believe, everyone has their own share of issues and my issues are something that nobody would really be interesting in hearing. I don’t understand, whether to call it sheer bad luck or the fact that I’m cursed, but nothing seems to be working out in my favour at all.

Take, for example, the car window that was damaged for no apparent reason at all, when there were atleast 4 other bigger cars there parked right besides my car. Still, my small hatchback was targeted. For what? Next, I’ve been running pillar to post to get my Axis bank debit card to be renewed that expired back in the month of April, 2020. But, NOTHING has been done with regards to that either. The bank executives say, generally, they send a message or two well before a card expiration date (which, I agree to), but they fail to understand how I did not receive any message at all.

Plus, the fact that no new ATM card has yet been issue to my account is beyond even their comprehension. Earlier today, I paid my home-branch (which is a whole 20kms. from where my home is) a second visit in the last 7 days, and although I am generally a very optimistic guy, but here, I am absolutely hopeless! I know, for sure that I’d receive a call in a day or two mentioning that my ATM card couldn’t be issued because of some God forsaken reason!

I did not quite believe in luck or destiny before all this Coronavirus pandemic hit us all. Even then, I thoroughly believed in thinking ahead and thinking positive. But, I am slowly breaking down, to the point where I’m just letting everything go. It is not like I am losing hope or I am veering towards depression. Far from that, as a matter of fact. It’s just that strange feeling – the one where you stop arguing, or fighting for even what’s right. Yes, that’s exactly the kind of feeling I am having since the past couple of weeks or so.

I’ve no idea what the future holds for all of us, or for the entire mankind as a whole, but I really want all of us to be at a place from where we can look ahead and see a world where we can live and thrive. Right now, as I see it, every single day is such a massive struggle – right from pushing myself out of the bed to doing everything on a daily basis – every single task feels like an absolute chore, which I despise.

I’ve not had proper food for the past 2 and a half days now. There have been a lot of issues on the family front as well, that’s breaking me from within. But, you know what is the funniest thing in all this? That I cannot even show it to the outer world, for I know it is just no worth it!